gris-grits

I Heart James Carville

2012-01-25T18:02:00.000-06:00

Carville to GOP: You have a disaster on your hands. It's been a terrible time to be a Republican. There have been many moments during this process that have caused me great joy. Certainly the events of Thursday, ending with the CNN debate, and even the Fox debate Monday night, have helped ease the pain of my beloved Tigers' and Saints' recent defeats. I mean, most people thought it was

For A Friend

2012-01-24T14:52:00.001-06:00

Gone From My Sight --Henry Van Dyke I am standing upon the seashore. A ship, at my side, spreads her white sails to the moving breeze and starts for the blue ocean. She is an object of beauty and strength. I stand and watch her until, at length, she hangs like a speck of white cloud just where the sea and sky come to mingle with each other. Then, someone at my side says, "There, she is gone"

I Love Having Parented

2012-01-23T08:30:00.006-06:00

Don't Carpe Diem I think parenting young children (and old ones, I've heard) is a little like climbing Mount Everest. Brave, adventurous souls try it because they've heard there's magic in the climb. They try because they believe that finishing, or even attempting the climb, are impressive accomplishments. They try because during the climb, if they allow themselves to pause and lift their eyes

Love Is...

2012-01-18T20:06:00.002-06:00

The sheer amount of bodily fluids (and solids) that you will willingly allow another person to smear on you because said person is your child.

And How Was Your Weekend?

2012-01-18T19:30:00.007-06:00

Mine pretty much sucked, thanks to that game. It started out ugly and stayed that way for quite some time, in between Pierre Thomas getting knocked out cold and Drew Brees throwing an interception that resulted in a second 49ers touchdown, both within the first quarter. At least the friends I watched the game with were entertaining. And I made a couple of excellent hors d'oeuvres. (If you

Just Stuff

2012-01-08T17:49:00.001-06:00

So far, 2012 hasn't started off that well. Everyone I know was ecstatic to put 2011 behind us. I really don't know what it was about 2011, but it just kinda sucked. It felt like we were in the doldrums or something. So, 2012 was supposed to be the year that things start getting better (depending, of course, on that whole Mayan calendar thing). But so far this year, which has barely just started,

Auld Lang Syne

2012-01-03T20:26:00.003-06:00

I officially gave up making resolutions, or at least big, supposed-to-change-your-life resolutions, when 2011 rolled around. I tried (unsuccessfully) to quit smoking during 2010 (and 2001; and 2005). Failed. I've made the this-is-the-year-I'm-finally-going-to-lose-some-weight resolution more years than I can count. Big resolutions like that seem to set me up for nothing other than failure. (And

Merry Christmas from the Family

2011-12-24T23:47:00.000-06:00

I'm extremely proud of this shot, even though it might not be the best photography in the world. I consider getting a picture of Emmeline wearing reindeer antlers, our cat Beignet wearing a Santa hat, and our dog Tchoupitoulas, also wearing reindeer antlers, all in the same picture, to be a major coup. (No, the cat doesn't look particularly happy--one almost might say slightly peeved and trying

Oh Christmas Tree

2011-12-23T22:06:00.000-06:00

Amen

2011-11-17T16:11:00.001-06:00

This is why I'm happy to be an Episcopalian. It's a church that actually cares about actual Christian ideals, like social and economic justice, rather than just spending all of its time spouting Old Testament verses and worrying about who's allowed to marry whom, who's going to burn in hell, etc. "As the OWS protestors point out, wealth in our country is increasingly concentrated in the hands of

Little Who Dat

2011-11-15T18:01:00.000-06:00

I love it that my daughter continues to be quite the Saints fan. While I was in Ohio, Kenny and Emmeline went to see the unveiling of the new lights for the Super Dome, and she cried because she was sad that I wasn't there to see it with them. Then, some friends gave Kenny their tickets to the Saints-Colts game and since I was still in Ohio (getting stuck on roller coasters and such), he decided

Baby Mine

2011-11-11T17:58:00.004-06:00

I recently discovered some old videos I'd taken of Emmeline as a baby that I thought I'd lost. I can't tell you how happy I am to see them again. I love my six-year-old with all of my heart, but sometimes, I sure do miss my baby.

Bucket List

2011-11-10T14:25:00.000-06:00

So, there's a national conference I go to every year for NIH grant administrators--normally, it's held in really fun locales like San Francisco and NYC (neither of which I got to attend). This spring, I was anxiously waiting to hear where this year's conference would be...and then the word came that it would be in Cleveland. Sorry, Ohioans, but even though my brother-in-law is from Cincinatti

Dear Mississippi:

2011-11-10T11:47:00.002-06:00

I just wanted to let you know that I'm proud of you for doing the right thing and voting down that idiotic personhood law.To be honest, after living within your borders for four years, I wasn't sure you had it in you. Maybe there's hope for you after all.Sincerely, A

Conversations With a Six-Year-Old, Volume 2*

2011-11-04T23:02:00.006-05:00

E: Mommy, what's a penis? Me: I'm sorry, what? Did you just ask me what a penis is? E: Yeah. Me. Oh. Okay then, a penis is a boy's private parts. E: Oh. Ewww. Me: So, why are you asking me what a penis is? E: Because V was walking around talking about penises today. Me: Oh. Okay. E: Mommy, why was V walking around talking about penises? Me: I don't know. I guess because she knows what

Happy Halloween from Dorothy

2011-10-31T22:53:00.000-05:00

Just Call Me Hitler

2011-10-13T20:58:00.003-05:00

If this post also addressed the need for free quality education for everyone, not just those who can afford it, it would be damn near perfect. At any rate, it perfectly sums up why I'm a bleeding heart/communist/socialist/fascist/liberal.I’m a liberal, so I probably dream bigger than you. For instance, I want everybody to have healthcare. I want lazy people to have healthcare. I want stupid

Ways in Which I Am Becoming My Grandmother*

2011-10-11T22:29:00.005-05:00

Today, while trying to yell at the cat about the fact that she almost made me kill myself by running around directly under my feet while I was walking, I had to go through three former cats' names before getting to the correct one.*If you were fifth out of 15 granchildren and had to listen to your grandmother do the "roll call" while trying to scold you, you'll understand this reference. (I just

Motherless Child

2011-10-11T22:10:00.004-05:00

Emmeline is on "fall break" this week--I guess all of the elementary schoolers needed a break, after having gone through six whole weeks of school--and I can't tell you how much I'm enjoying the silence.Yes, silence--because I met my mother in Slidell yesterday morning before heading back to the city to work, and tonight is my second full night of childlessness. I'll be getting E back tomorrow

Hugh Knew?

2011-10-07T18:40:00.005-05:00

I'm not an avid fan of the television show House. I don't dislike it--I've watched it a few times and have been entertained. But I'm too busy to commit to more than a couple of weekly television shows (hello, Survivor and Top Chef) and my schedule was full when House came out. Still, I think Hugh Laurie is a great actor and is pretty easy on the eyes, as well.So imagine my surprise when I came

Dull, Dull, Dull

2011-10-07T18:06:00.002-05:00

I'm still alive, to the three of you who may have been worried about me. I just learned through first-hand knowledge that applying for two massive NIH training grants within a six-week time frame is a really, really, really bad idea. (Now if someone could just tell my boss....) Anyway, it's (mostly) done now, and I'm heaving a massive sigh of relief--but it meant a rather long period of working

Quotes of the Week

2011-09-15T20:08:00.002-05:00

If you came up with a bumper sticker that pulls together the platform of this year’s crop of Republican presidential candidates, it would have to be: "Repeal the 20th century. Vote GOP."--Steven Pearlstein, The Washington Post Listening to Perry try to a put a complicated policy sentence together is like watching a chimp play with a locked suitcase.--Rick Perry, Republican strategist

Google Search of the Month

2011-09-15T20:01:00.003-05:00

The incredibly bad spelling google pervs are back. Today's search? "How dow gris have six with gris?" I think that means "how do girls have sex with girls," but I'm not absolutely positive.On the plus side, "boob in a vacuum cleaner" hasn't been back in awhile. I guess he/she finally figured out how to get his/her boob into or out of the vacuum.

Dear New Orleans Saints

2011-09-15T18:03:00.002-05:00

I get to go to my first game in the Dome since December 2007. That game kind of sucked, because, as usual, you lost that game to Tampa. (Why do you guys always lose the December game against Tampa? This year will be different, right?) To top that off, I got home to a call that my grandmother had died. All in all, not a good day.So, if you could, I'd really appreciate it if you could kick the

One Love

2011-09-03T19:17:00.008-05:00

A good song for a tropical stormy kind of night in New Orleans. If you haven't bought the Playing for Change CD yet, you really should. In my opinion, this version would make the beautiful and amazing Bob Marley proud. One love, one heart Let's get together and feel all right Let's get together and feel all right One love, one heart Let's get together and feel all right As it was in the

Six Years

2011-08-29T20:55:00.022-05:00

I'm not sure I have anything left to say about Katrina that hasn't already been said. When I turned on WWL radio this morning on my way to work, they were giving the results of one of their usual online polls and today's question was whether people felt they were better off since Katrina. I'm happy to say that about 65% of the respondents were saying they were better off, which, to me, seemed

Irene

2011-08-28T20:44:00.003-05:00

I guess I should have known this morning when I heard the CNN newscasters say that the Northeast had "dodged a bullet" that Irene wasn't over yet. That phrase, in my opinion, is the kiss of death. My heart is with the people in that part of the country. And I forgive the friend of a friend in Boston who made some smartass comment on Facebook about how they'd all be fine because they weren't

This City

2011-08-26T18:26:00.006-05:00

This city won’t wash away This city won’t ever drown Blood in the water and hell to pay Sky tear open and pain rain down. Doesn’t matter, cause come what may I ain’t ever going to leave this town This city won’t wash away This city won't ever drown Ain’t the river or the wind to blame As everybody around here knows Nothing holding back Pontchartrain Except for a prayer and a promise’s ghost

Conversations With A Six-Year-Old, Volume 1

2011-08-25T14:52:00.000-05:00

This conversation took place at my office, during my own version of "take your daughter to work day." Me: Okay, Emmeline, it's 1:00. You've done a great job of entertaining yourself while I worked, so let's go have some lunch. E: Great, Mommy! Did you bring a lunchbox? Me: Um, no--I thought we could go out to lunch. To a restaurant. E: To a restaurant? What about your boss? Me: What do you

PTSD and Joy

2011-08-20T00:10:00.004-05:00

Because I'm a masochist, I watched a National Geographic Channel special on Katrina earlier this evening. Not really surprisingly, I started shaking incontrollably while watching it. To make myself feel better, I just watched the youtube video of Jim Henderson calling Garrett Hartley's NFC championship field goal against the Vikings. And then I got goosebumps. It's goooooooooood. Pigs have flown

Hallelujah

2011-08-19T20:30:00.007-05:00

Hallelujah is a Hebrew word which means "Glory to the Lord." The song explains that many kinds of Hallelujahs do exist. I say, all the perfect and broken Hallelujahs have an equal value. It's, as I say, a desire to affirm my faith in life, not in some formal religious way but with enthusiasm, with emotion.--Leonard Cohen I've heard there was a secret chord That David played, and it pleased the

Politicalifragilisticexpialidocious

2011-08-17T20:10:00.011-05:00

I had MSNBC on tonight in the background (Hi, I'm Andy, and I'm a liberal) while I was unloading the dishwasher, making dinner for E, etc., and I eventually got to the point where I had to turn it off after about the fourth reference to Rick Perry and his ridiculous comments because it was just so. Damn. Depressing. Really? This is what we're back to? Questioning Obama's patriotism? Sending out

First Grade

2011-08-17T08:45:00.002-05:00

World's Shortest Poll

2011-08-16T14:52:00.002-05:00

Caller: Good afternoon. I'm calling from Governor Bobby Jindal's re-election campaign. Do you plan to support our governor in his bid for re-election? Me: Absolutely not. Caller: Um, okay, then. Uh, er, goodbye. I'm assuming I'm one of the few "no" votes she'd gotten.

Pride and Joy

2011-07-29T23:38:00.006-05:00

Pretty soon, I'm going to have to start a heading called "Songs I'm Obsessed With." Here's my latest fixation, "Pride and Joy" by Brandi Carlile. It started the usual way--I heard the song a few times in passing and liked it. Then, someone burned a CD for me with the song on it, and I really listened to it. And it has those two magical qualities that suck me in every time--a singer whose voice

Six

2011-07-20T14:14:00.002-05:00

Emmeline is six now, so I decided it was finally time to get rid of about six bags worth of clothes she's outgrown, her baby stroller, and the pack-n-play. At the same time, when I dropped them off at the Salvation Army, it was all I could do to force myself to hand the items over to the attendant, when what I really wanted to do was just take it all back home again. Why is it so difficult to let

Posted Without Comment*

2011-07-20T10:07:00.001-05:00

*Because I think you probably know how I feel about this.From a survey of 574 GOP primary voters nationwide:H/T, First Draft.

Strange Moments in Weight Loss History

2011-07-19T10:43:00.002-05:00

As of today, I have now lost enough weight* that my office chair no longer slides under my desk without the arm rests banging into the desk. Definitely a weird and new experience to have to adjust the arm rests on your chair.*That's 17 pounds, for those of you playing at home.

The Equivalent of Eating What?

2011-07-14T16:34:00.004-05:00

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart Get More: Daily Show Full Episodes,Political Humor & Satire Blog,The Daily Show on Facebook Wow. This is the fine quality programming that Fox has come up with to replace Glen Beck? And, as has been asked on the internets, why is it equivalent to eating a live raccoon? WTF is that about? Because our first lady is African American and therefore must eat live

End of an Era

2011-06-16T21:04:00.003-05:00

Well, it's official. As of June 28th (which is also my birthday), my husband will no longer be a restaurant manager and I will no longer be a restaurant widow. I find this news both exciting and terrifying. Exciting because for the first time in our almost 17 years together, my husband will have a somewhat normal 9 to 5 job and weekends off. Which means that we might can do things together like

Trailer Hell

2011-06-10T11:05:00.006-05:00

I can't decide whether this article posted on The Lens today regarding the re-emergence of Katrina FEMA trailers in the areas affected by the recent tornadoes makes me more angry or sad. I hate it that people are having to resort to living in those death-traps again, and it brings back unpleasant memories of 2006. My sister-in-law and her two sons lived in a FEMA trailer for about 18 months

The D-Word

2011-06-09T21:43:00.000-05:00

So, I've officially been on a diet for 30 days now. Coca-cola (aka, nectar of the gods), in all of its pure, sugary deliciousness, has not crossed my lips since April, except in its highly inferior diet form. (And no, Coca-cola Zero does not taste like real coke, no matter what any of you say.)I've learned to live within my Weight Watchers points and, to some extent, I've learned to live with

Left Behind

2011-06-08T21:13:00.004-05:00

I called my friend Dorothy tonight, who just had her second child about two months ago. We hadn't spoken since Mardi Gras when she was last in New Orleans, hugely pregnant and ready to get the whole damn thing over with. We've played phone tag for the past couple of months and I haven't tried too hard to follow up, to be quite honest. I've told myself that I've stayed away and haven't tried to

Keeping Up With the Joneses

2011-04-14T15:46:00.004-05:00

This article from the Financial Times has apparently been around for a few months, but I just came across it recently. Do I even need to detail how ridiculous I find it to be, an impassioned plea that we should see how difficult a fictional family of four named the Joneses have it because they only make $250K a year? Okay, fine—I’ll even agree that judging by today’s standards, the Joneses are

Ten Years

2011-04-11T20:17:00.002-05:00

For CharlesAugust 29, 1978 - April 11, 2001

One of the Many Reasons Why I Don't Eat at Applebee's

2011-04-10T18:13:00.002-05:00

Does it make me a bad person that I found this story mildly amusing, considering that the kid was okay and everything? Applebee's sorry after tot served booze in sippy cup The only thing I'm really confused about is how anyone could mistake pre-made margaritas for apple juice, even if the container was mislabelled as such. I mean, last time I checked, apple juice and margaritas look (and smell)

04.07.02

2011-04-07T20:05:00.001-05:00

Dear K: Happy ninth anniversary. It's not one of the big, monumental number anniversaries, and it falls on a Thursday, so there will be no celebration, as you're working while I'm home with Emmeline. But still, it's our anniversary, and I love you. I don't know about you, but it's sometimes very hard for me to believe that we've been together for over 16 years now. Oftentimes, it doesn't seem

A Letter to My Daughter, 04.11

2011-04-03T19:53:00.006-05:00

Dear Emmeline: Okay, six-year-old, this is it. You're officially not a baby anymore at all. Except for when you still are. Except for the words that you still mix up on a consistent basis, which never cease to crack me up. "Sanimitizer" for sanitizer. "Coffee" for copy. (As in, "Mommy, don't coffee my paper!") "Andylance" for ambulance. (I like to think that you named that one after me.)

Rolling in the Deep

2011-04-03T19:24:00.004-05:00

Every once in awhile, a song comes along that I just fall in love with immediately and have to listen to over and over again. Last time it happened was about four years ago, when "Hate Me" by Blue October came out. It was right around the time that we were making preparations to move back into our house, after we rebuilt after Katrina. I listened to that song over and over again while I packed,

Indian Red

2011-03-24T14:57:00.014-05:00

For the first time since moving to New Orleans, I went to "chase Indians" with a group of friends last Saturday night for St. Joseph's Day.There wasn't much chasing involved, as it turned out. We didn't have to do much other than stand around near the corner of Dryades and Third Streets, with tons of other people, and wait for the Indians to come to us. And come to us, they did. Tribe after

Spellcheck

2011-03-21T21:29:00.003-05:00

Dear Members of the Press:Since we've decided to bomb Libya and all, do you think maybe we could all agree on how to spell Khadafi? I swear, in one news program this morning, I saw it spelled at least three different ways. Is it Khadafi or Gaddafi? Or Qaddafi? Moammar or Momar? It's like the whole Osama/Usama thing all over again.Maybe we could, I don't know, ask him how he'd like his name

All on a Mardi Gras Day

2011-03-13T20:50:00.010-05:00

It's over. Again. Thank God. Every year, I'm so excited about Mardi Gras arriving that I can't stand it. And every year, by Ash Wednesday, I'm incredibly relieved that it's all over. And exhausted. And tired of purple, green, and gold. This year was no exception, and I think I lost even more brain cells this year than usual. I blame it on being middle-aged. (In dog years, I'm 287.) But it might

Bieber Fever

2011-03-12T17:46:00.000-06:00

My favorite costumed group from Mardi Gras needs no explanation. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the Bieber patrol.

03.04.11

2011-03-04T20:23:00.002-06:00

It's official. Emmeline is no longer--in any way, shape, or form--a baby. She is a "big girl" of six years old. And has already begun informing me of all of the things she can do now that she's six, repeatedly.And because I endured 41 weeks of being pregnant during Mardi Gras 2005, she got to reap the rewards this year by having a birthday during Mardi Gras weekend. (The big year will be 2014,

Mardi Gras Through the Years

2011-03-01T16:15:00.013-06:00

Okay, I need my daughter to stop growing now. She'll be six on Friday and is very excited that the City is throwing parades in her honor. 2006 2007 2008 2009 2010 2011

Of Mice and Men

2011-02-01T20:09:00.005-06:00

Since becoming a homeowner, I've become much more intimately acquainted with various household tasks than I ever would've wanted to. For example, five years ago, I would have willingly wagered with you that I would go to my grave without ever having snaked out a drain line. Now, I'm such a pro that I can give other people pointers on how to do it.Drain snaking? Check. Ice maker fixing? Check.

Suck It, Bears

2011-01-23T17:01:00.005-06:00

The Packers, finishing what the Bears started.

I Can Haz Refund Now?

2011-01-21T16:09:00.003-06:00

For the first time in my tax-filing history, my itemized deductions FINALLY count for more than the standard deduction. I feel like such a grown-up! I had no idea it was so worthwhile to actually itemize all of the donations I've made to the Salvation Army--who knew that 10 garbage bags full of men's, women's and children's clothing is worth over $3,000?Perhaps this year, I'll finally get up the

Conversations with A Five-Year Old, Volume Two

2011-01-13T15:36:00.001-06:00

Emmeline: I've been very gassy all day today.Me: Maybe it was something you ate.Emmeline: No, I think my butt was just excited and wanted to chat.

12.27.10

2011-01-07T22:52:00.014-06:00

On the night of Monday, December 27th, I did what a lot of people in this town did. I went to a bar with my husband to watch the Saints kick the Falcons' collective butts. It was a night like any other Saints night in New Orleans--we met up with some friends, did some drinking, and watched the game. One of the women who met us there was Rebecca, a friend of a friend. Rebecca and I don't

With Apologies to Stephen Hawking

2010-12-16T12:19:00.002-06:00

This was, hands down, one of the funniest interviews I've seen on The Daily Show, ever.The Daily Show With Jon StewartMon - Thurs 11p / 10cRicky Gervaishttp://www.thedailyshow.com/Daily Show Full EpisodesPolitical Humor & Satire BlogThe Daily Show on Facebook

What Athenae Said

2010-12-16T12:15:00.001-06:00

Athenae at First Draft knocks it out of the park again:"Let's stop taking care of people entirely. It's too much. It's always too much, when it's something like keeping the lights on or feeding somebody or educating him. That's too much, too expensive, and so what if we lost entire PALLETS of cash in the Middle East? So what if we shoveled cash at two wars and never bothered to ask where it was

Amen

2010-12-14T11:02:00.002-06:00

Why I Return to New Orleans"In those neighborhoods—if you listen carefully enough—beneath the warmth and hospitality and stories of human struggle and resiliency, you will also hear a more negative note. There’s a feeling of frustration in New Orleans that sometimes comes close to real anger. New Orleanians may not be able to recite the precise statistics and dollar amounts, but they know full

Go, Bernie, Go

2010-12-10T16:26:00.003-06:00

Not that it will have any real effect, but I'm awed to see Senator Bernie Sanders (I-VT) standing up for what he believes in and filibustering the deal to extend the Bush tax cuts for the wealthiest Americans. And I am in shock--absolute shock--that my senator, the milquetoast, blue-dog Mary Landrieu, has actually been helping him.He's on hour number seven now and has said he will go on as long

Merry Christmas from the Family

2010-12-10T09:18:00.003-06:00

My husband always says this song reminds him of Christmas growing up with his family. After 16 years together, I can see why....Feliz Navidad, y'all.

Joyeux Noel

2010-12-10T08:48:00.000-06:00

What Driftglass Said

2010-12-07T11:37:00.002-06:00

The Last Democrat"The first rule of American politics is that presidents get elected by promising to keep the American people safe from one peril or another, real or imagined.The converse of that rule is that no American president ever got elected by promising to keep the American people safe from themselves. Carter tried and lost. Mondale tried and got stomped. Others tried and were crushed

Yes, Virginia, There is a Shockey

2010-11-18T21:34:00.002-06:00

Lately, Emmeline has been asking me quite frequently if Santa is real. This took me by huge surprise, considering she's only five years old. I believed in Santa at least until I was around eight years old. And then I discovered the truth, which was helped along by the fact that Santa used to leave my sister and I notes on Christmas morning--notes that would thank us for the milk and cookies and

Murder, Crow-Style

2010-11-18T21:02:00.004-06:00

Like a certain other New Orleans blogger, I've always had a fascination with crows. I don't know what it is about them--I guess I just think they're incredibly cool birds, with their jet black feathers and eyes that, to me at least, have always seemed to emanate intelligence.As mentioned in a couple of previous posts, I work on the roof of the Tidewater building, now the Tulane SPHTM. Next time

Horror Movie Setting, Anyone?

2010-11-05T11:23:00.007-05:00

About 12 years ago, I guess, the City of New Orleans got its very own amusement park. At first, it was called Jazz Land--it was a pretty dismal failure, with pretty lame rides. Still, it was an amusement park, so we went to it a lot. It had one truly good rollercoaster, a wooden one named the Mega Zeph and modeled after the Zephyr of bygone days at Pontchartrain Beach. Around 2003, Six Flags

Parlez-vous Francais?

2010-11-04T21:09:00.005-05:00

Tonight, Emmeline and I were reading a book, and I was asking her to count the different items she saw on the page. And for the first time since starting at her new French immersion school, she automatically began counting in French rather than in English. What a wonderful new world we live in, where my little girl, who's only five years old, is already well on her way to becoming bilingual. I

11.03.10

2010-11-03T14:21:00.003-05:00

I'm back, finally, after a looooong month of the federal grant application from hell and a myriad of problems in my personal life.So, I'd like to say that I'm surprised and disappointed by the outcome of yesterday's elections, but we all saw that coming, didn't we? Sadly, I'm used to the fact that all of my votes are pretty much cast in vain--a blue woman in a very red state. Hopefully, we'll

Halloween 2010

2010-11-01T12:31:00.001-05:00

I guess it's time to accept the fact that I am raising a native New Orleanian. Case in point, I give you the Who Dat Cat (her idea).

Dear WWL Executives

2010-09-24T16:50:00.003-05:00

I get it. I know that your political views are about as right-wing conservative as you can get, and I know that that's primarily what your audience wants to hear, as evidenced by the calls you take over the air. I get it. I mean, hell, it's not real hard to figure out--there's no doubt in my mind that you would still be happily broadcasting Rush Limbaugh for 3-4 hours a day if WRNO/Clear Channel

Ode to the South

2010-09-21T00:42:00.003-05:00

I'm in Seattle right now, at a conference on global health. What can I tell you about Seattle? It's so clean here. So green here. So walkable. So Pacific Northwest. Temperatures in the 60s, which feels like a godsend, considering our unrelenting 90+ degree heat in New Orleans. It took me 12 hours to travel here yesterday. Apparently, it takes less time to travel to Peru from New Orleans than it

Google Search of the Month

2010-09-15T21:31:00.003-05:00

Oh, you people on the google. You never cease to entertain me. This month's search? "What are the chances of a live bullet going off if hit by a lawn mower?" I don't know. What are the chances? And why would you have live bullets lying around in your lawn?

Jours d'école*

2010-09-03T21:44:00.009-05:00

Emmeline's first day of kindergarten. It would have been completely anti-climactic, as she spent a year in Catholic pre-K last year and we had planned to send her back. But we got a call over the summer, saying that there was an opening at one of the charter language immersion schools, and after much agonizing over the decision, we decided to enroll her there.I was worried that it would be

Five Years On

2010-08-28T18:40:00.002-05:00

I debated about whether to put this post up or not--I feel like all of us are suffering from Katrina fatigue--or at the very least, Katrina anniversary fatigue. In some ways, it seems like it happened yesterday--in others, it feels like a lifetime ago.So, I'll give you the option of whether you want to read my five-year post or not. If you do, it's here.

No One Will Ever See It Again

2010-08-26T21:55:00.000-05:00

Katrina Memory #5

2010-08-13T20:32:00.006-05:00

Sunday night, August 28th - My mother and I got to Atlanta on Saturday. It's been a weird day of alternating between pretending that nothing's wrong and wallowing in the deepest depths of fear. We go out for take-out and come back to my sister's house to eat dinner in front of the tv. Of course, we tune into the Weather Channel to see what's going on. The streets are flooding from the rain, and

1927-2005

2010-08-06T21:35:00.000-05:00

Google Search of the Month

2010-08-05T09:35:00.001-05:00

The person who's trying to figure out how to insert or extract his or her boob from a vacuum cleaner is back.Dear weirdo: go away.

Get Used to It

2010-08-05T09:23:00.004-05:00

This makes me happy. One of these days, people are going to realize that trying to legislate who other people are allowed to love is ridiculous. I've never understood the argument that somehow, gay marriage is a threat to straight marriage and I never will. If two people love each other, they should be entitled to the same rights and benefits as anyone else in this country, regardless of their

Katrina Memory #4

2010-08-04T22:08:00.002-05:00

Kenny and I are in Bay St. Louis, in December of 2005. I've just gotten back to New Orleans within the past two weeks, and it's my first chance to see Bay St. Louis, where Kenny and I had lived for about five years, and where a large portion of our families had lived.We drive down Main Street, trying to get as close to Beach Boulevard as we can. We end up parking a few blocks away, where the road

Katrina Memory #3

2010-08-03T22:54:00.004-05:00

I'm driving around the Lower 9th Ward, March of 2006. It's probably about the tenth time I've been there in the past few months, because I've had this weird compulsion, since moving back, to drive around the most severely damaged neighborhoods, over and over and over again, taking non-stop pictures. I don't know why I felt the need to do it--I guess it was my way of grieving over what had

Synchronicity

2010-08-03T21:43:00.001-05:00

All of my life, I've had feelings of self-doubt, feelings of self-consciousness, feelings of not measuring up. Oftentimes, as I get older and somewhat more sure of myself, those feelings will subside for awhile. But they're always there, waiting just beneath the surface. I've been in therapy for it. It helped a little. I took anti-depressants for it. It helped a little. I can thoroughly describe

Cat People

2010-08-02T08:47:00.003-05:00

Don't get me wrong, I love cats. I think I've had at least one cat, sometimes two, in my life since around the time I was four. But some people take it a bit too far, I think. Like the woman in the elevator on Friday. She was deep in conversation with another woman, who asked her about the picture pinned to her chest. They then proceeded to have a long conversation about her "babies"--their ages,

A Letter to My Daughter, 07/10

2010-07-12T21:26:00.004-05:00

Dear Emmeline: And so it begins. You're five now, and there's very little baby left in you. Now, your father and I spend most of our time marveling at how grown up you are. You now roll your eyes at us when you're exasperated. You can finally pronounce "computer" and "penguin" correctly. You prefer iCarly to the Wonder Pets and Dora (although I turn the channel most of the time). You are most

Just Because #8

2010-06-29T23:14:00.003-05:00

Up to the Mountain - Patty GriffinI went up to the mountainBecause you asked me toUp over the cloudsTo where the sky was blueI could see all around meEverywhereI could see all around meEverywhereSometimes I feel likeI've never been nothing but tiredAnd I'll be walkingTill the day I expireSometimes I lay downNo more can I doBut then I go on againBecause you ask me toSome days I look downAfraid I

Katrina Memory #2*

2010-06-29T22:59:00.002-05:00

It’s around August 30th or 31st, although I have no idea of which—we’re at my sister’s house in Atlanta and we have no earthly clue of what’s going on in Bay St. Louis, other than the aerial shots taken by news crews flying over the area, which leave us fearing the worst. Kenny has made it to Bay St. Louis and has made contact with his mother, stepfather, and grandmother. He’s made it to Mom and

Katrina Memory #1

2010-06-23T20:42:00.003-05:00

In December of 2005, right after Emmeline and I had just moved back into the city (Kenny had been back and forth for work the whole time and living back in New Orleans for about a month), my husband and I got a much-needed, child-free night out on the town. Needless to say, it was a very stressful time in our lives. The city was in shambles. Most of our relatives were still living in other states

Google Search of the Month

2010-06-23T14:35:00.003-05:00

I am happy to report that this month's top search on the google was for "FU BP." I have nothing to add to that, except that I seem to be getting vastly better visitors via the google these days. Oh, and FUBP. I mean really, who names their yacht Bob?

Dear Blogger.com:

2010-06-15T21:13:00.002-05:00

It would be helpful if you could re-program your spell check function to recognize the word "blogger."Sincerely, ALM

BP Fatigue

2010-06-15T16:41:00.001-05:00

Just go read Athenae at First Draft. That is all.

Honest Scrap Award

2010-06-10T22:28:00.009-05:00

Several months ago, I was given an “Honest Scrap Award,” which I’ll be honest and say I’d never heard of before. But, ironically (or not), it’s an award passed around to bloggers by other bloggers for their honesty. So, the rules of the award say that I must do the following: 1. Brag about the award. 2. Include the name of the blogger who gave you the award and link back to that blogger. 3.

The Terrorists Bombed the Gulf

2010-06-10T21:56:00.002-05:00

I hope this isn't offensive to any New Orleans bloggers, but it's been in my head for days now. Ashley Morris, I salute you.THE TERRORISTS BOMBED THE GULF. THE TERRORISTS BOMBED THE GULF. THE TERRORISTS BOMBED THE GULF. THE TERRORISTS BOMBED THE GULF. THE TERRORISTS BOMBED THE GULF. THE TERRORISTS BOMBED THE GULF. THE TERRORISTS BOMBED THE GULF. THE TERRORISTS BOMBED THE GULF. THE TERRORISTS

My City of Ruins

2010-06-06T21:48:00.004-05:00

There's a blood red circleOn the cold dark groundAnd the rain is falling downThe church door's thrown openI can hear the organ's songBut the congregation's goneMy city of ruinsMy city of ruinsNow the sweet bells of mercyDrift through the evening treesYoung men on the cornerLike scattered leaves,The boarded up windows,The empty streetsWhile my brother's down on his kneesMy city of ruinsMy city of

Horror and Heartbreak

2010-06-04T18:56:00.004-05:00

The horror continues here on the Gulf Coast, as each day news of the oil spill becomes more and more dismal. Each day, another attempt to staunch the flow of oil fails. Each day, more coastline is covered in oil—more than 140 miles thus far. Each day, more “protective” booms fail. The heartbreak continues, as each day, more wildlife dies. Each day, the estimate of the amount of oil gushing

FU/BP, or How to Handle PR After an Environmental Catastrophe, Hayward Style

2010-06-01T10:44:00.007-05:00

A BP primer in public relations: Step 1: Underestimate the amount of oil being released into the Gulf. Rinse and repeat, over and over and over again. Step 2: Defend your company's safety record leading up to the disaster, despite the fact that your company has been charged with the highest number of "egregious and willful" safety violations during the past five years--a total of 760 violations

Dear President Obama:

2010-05-26T14:56:00.006-05:00

I feel a bit foolish about it now, but I'm one of the people who voted for you and believed you when you said you were going to go about things differently if you were elected. That you were going to try to fundamentally change the way business is done in Washington. I knew it would be difficult--hell, I knew it would be virtually impossible. But I thought you were going to try. But here we are,