Conversations With a Six-Year-Old, Volume 2*

E: Mommy, what's a penis?

Me: I'm sorry, what? Did you just ask me what a penis is?

E: Yeah.


Me. Oh. Okay then, a penis is a boy's private parts.

E: Oh. Ewww.

Me: So, why are you asking me what a penis is?

E: Because V was walking around talking about penises today.

Me: Oh. Okay.

E: Mommy, why was V walking around talking about penises?

Me: I don't know. I guess because she knows what one is and wanted to tell everybody about it?

E: Yeah, I guess so. So, I can go around saying "penis, penis, penis" at school?

Me: Um, no. That's probably not a good idea.

E: Why not?

Me: Well, penis isn't a bad word, but it's not really one you just walk around using in every-day conversation. It's more of a word that you use when it's something you need to talk about.

E: Well then, can I walk up to Jasper and say, "Hey Jasper, how's your penis doing today?"

Me: No, that's probably not a good idea either.

Me: (Turns the music up.)**

*The best part of this conversation was getting to see the look on my husband's face when I relayed it all to him.

**I also know how ironic this is, as someone who worked as the PR person for the Louisiana HIV/AIDS program for four years and who regularly had conversations about and wrote about penises, vaginas, fluids, and discharge. I just was never sure how to broach the subject with E, as I didn't want her to be the girl who walked around school saying "penis, penis, penis."